| "Would you like to
meet my parents?" Gulp.
Meeting his family for the first time can be more nerve-racking
than going on your first date. What if they don't like
me? What if I don't like them? What if I say something
wrong? These, and many more questions will be flying
around your head. Don`t worry we have some useful tips
for surviving the introduction with your in-laws.
First Impressions matter
Go girl, this guy must be serious if he wants you to
meet his parents. But remember first impressions are
very important. If his parents take a dislike to you
on your first encounter they may never accept you, and
if they do it could take a long time.
Get wise
Find out as much as you can about his family by asking
him questions about them. If you know that his parents
are very conservative, you may want to cover up that
tattoo or temporarily remove that nose ring - or at
least have your partner warn them of your body art -
before meeting them.
Until you have got to the point of calling them mum
and dad, try to steer clear of any family disputes or
difference of opinions.
Long before you meet his parents, talk with your boyfriend
about what he wants out of the visit, letting him share
what to address and avoid. "He needs to prepare
you and support you when you get there.
Think of questions you would like to ask them. After
all, its not just about them liking you, you also have
to like them - they could be your future in-laws. Talk
about current events, and target their interests or
careers.
House guest etiquette
If you are staying at their home for a night, or a few
days, show them a token of appreciation by offering
them a bouquet of flowers or a potted plant.
Take a bottle of wine to dinner (check with your partner
that they drink first. They might be recovering alcoholics
and you don't want to get them back on the band wagon
do you?)
If you are a vegetarian make sure you let them know
beforehand. Make sure you EAT all or at least most of
your dinner. You don't want to offend them.
Most important, don't overdo the booze. The last thing
you want to do is get drunk and be critical of his mother's
cooking.
Where to sleep
Although the two of you may share a bed on home turf,
his parents may not approve of it in their home, so
do respect his parents wishes. (Well at least until
they are asleep :o) If you do wait until his parents
are asleep and decide on a quickie, make sure you don't
fall asleep in his bed or you may get caught, and that
won't do you any good when trying to score some brownie
points.)
What if they hate me?
Keep in mind that his parents may be just as anxious
as you are and that they are probably thinking and feeling
exactly the same.
While it's normal to want to be popular with potential
in-laws, be open to the fact that you may not "click."
Do not expect to build an instant bond with them, but
instead try to help them be at ease with you, opening
the door for a warm encounter the next time you get
together.
|
